Back at Sea

I'm getting some experience with hospice right now. In home palliative care is amazing, but also really stressful for care-givers. There is no popping out for a few minutes, no simply going to bed without confirming that someone will be present through the night, close by, and ready to jump when needed. There is no sitting down to work and focus for several hours at a time. The only thing that is constant is the waiting: waiting for a needed change in sitting position or place, waiting for a call to help with a bathroom trip, waiting for nurses to come by for quick visits, waiting for video doctor's appointments, waiting for a call that more meds are needed for pain or breathing, waiting for the end and having no idea when that might be (days, weeks, months? No idea.).

Of course, I am grateful as well. I get time to say I love you. My family is coming together to help in new ways (I know some that didn't come together. An additional tragedy).

Also, (of course) life goes on. Work doesn't stop, appliances break down, COVID continues to make life more complicated. There are meetings to attend, shopping that has to be done, animals that have vet appointments, and everyone has their own healthcare to consider. We try to manage stress and take care of business outside our home cocoon; I bake bread and make blueberry pancakes for breakfast, run to Costco for milk and eggs, and maybe a roasted chicken for dinner, work on syllabi for class and worry about classes getting canceled (I'm the lowest rung on the ladder).

Yup, that whole overwhelmed and at the mercy of the seas, I'm there. Reacquainting myself with Odysseus, looking for help from Circe, and hoping that my crew and I make it back to safe harbor. The Hero's Journey is never truly finished.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.